Biscuita and Gravy

She and he sat eating lunch, biscuits and gravy, at the table in the small kitchen of their studio apartment.  She read the newspaper as she ate.  She looked up.  "My God," she said, "this mother and father murdered their sixteen-year-old daughter . . !"
"Some people are garbage," he said.
". . . they wanted her to marry some rich guy, but she wouldn't because she was in love with some poor guy . . . they said they killed her for family honor."
"Those people with that family 'honor' buisness are like primitives who've accidently blundered into the 21st century -- the civilized world -- from the Stone Age."
"We need to do some demonstrations against them," she said.
"Have to take off from work for that," he mumbled.  "Less gravy."
"And the price of flour is going up," she said.  "Less biscuits -- and gas is going up another nickel . . ."
"Less gravy means less marriage, less flour, less biscuits, less gas -- gravy affects everything . . ."
" 'Gravy affects every --' what kinda gravy you talking about?"

Clubs, Machetes, and Spears

Watching the long, low spread of color becoming crimson just above the distant tree tops and hold back the night as they sat in the porch-swing that evening in the small southern town, the grandmother asked her grandson, "Whata you wanna be when you grow up?"
"A policeman," he said.
"A policeman has to think fast.  Can  you think fast?"
"Sho'," the boy said.
"How old are you now?"
"Nine."
"Ever been in any fights?"
"Sho' -- but I whupped 'em."
"Okay, let's say you a policeman and you and some mo' police are facing a lot of men who're armed with bricks, clubs, machetes, and spears -- and maybe some guns you can't see.  And these men are looking wild-eyed and crazy, screaming and hollering and jumping all around threatening y'all like a bunch of illiterate primitives -- what do you do?"
"I'd shoot 'em."
"But millions of people all over the world will cry crocodile tears and accuse you and the other policemen of shooting innocent, unarmed men."
"But they was armed and --"
"And the people will say that those men were poor and helpless and had come to protest in peace . . ."
"Then why did they come with them clubs, and machetes and spears, grandma?"

Profiling Police

Ughmo and Igmo were big men, muscular, with shaved heads.  And they wore their britches questionably lower than their butts.  Ughmo was saying, "Yeah, well people say, 'Why y'all against the police'?"
"Yeah, and they say, 'Y'all don't want black people talking to the police,' " Igmo pointed out.
"Yeah," Ughmo continued, "and they say, 'Then when y'all get robbed or stabbed or shot --' "
"Which is quite regular," Igmo interrupted.  "They then say, 'Then y'all holler for the police --' "
"And they say," Ughmo interrupted.  " 'Then, y'all on all the TV stations belly-aching that the police don't get there fast enough because y'all blacks . . .' "
"And, Ughmo, they say we always resisting arrest . . ."
"Jes lak we s'pose to stand there when a police is coming to us wit a gun and a club on and let him peacefully arrest us -- 'specially after we only done a lil' sump'um wrong --"
"But, Ughmo you 'fessin' that sometime we might do a lil' sump'um wrong?"
"Naw, um jes saying that we might sometime do a lil' sump'um not altogether right -- let's say a lil' sump'um unsociable."
"Then, put'n it that way shows jes how fair-minded wit the truth we is as a people --"
"Now you git'n to the grits in it, Amo -- I almost called you Amos."
"Well, Ughmo, I have to admit we was beginning to sound a lil' lak that Amos 'n Andy Show."
" 'Cept we speak mo' better English than them."
"And, Ughmo, if the police as' us to pull our britches up we s'pose to keep on hollering --"
"Police brutality!"

Brother Bubba

"Let's go," Bubba said"
"Where?"
"Downtown," he said.
"For what?"
"So white folks will notice us."
"What . . !  How we gonna steal sump'um if we want people looking at us . . ?"
"They try to pretend we don't exist -- that's why I wear my britches low, showing my behind --"
"You profiling yourself, Bubba."
"But that'll show'em um hin'r . . ."
"That's like business people retailing a product, like going in a fast-food place and they playing that music of some brother or sister screaming and whining for somebody to love 'em -- I have to get the hell outta there quick, fast, and in a hurry.  You wanna be like that music?"
"Whatever um is, um is what um is."
"No wonder other people are noted for their business community, their unique language, food, and customs; we wanna be noticed for how we wear our britches, profiling ourselves."

Departmentalism Or Schizolaw?

"Now let me get this straight," he said.  He and the lawyer stood in front of the courthouse.  "If he talked about how he hated black or white or red or yellow or brown people and went out and off'd one, he can't be charged as a racist?"
"Not in criminal court -- that's for criminal cases."
"But ain't  he a racist --"
"If he's charged as a racist he has to stand trial in a civil-rights court --"
" -- and ain't he the same person no matter what court he's tried in?"
"In a sense, yes, but the law is specific, you have to be tried in a civil-rights court if you're charged with a racist killing.  You see, you violated his civil rights when you killed him --"
"But ain't dead dead?  You violated all somebody's rights -- civil and uncivil -- when you killed 'em -- you can't be a lil' dead, you dead or you ain't dead."
"That's true, but we have to be organized, be specific in a democracy -- it's called departmentalism --"
"m-m-m . . ."
"What do you mean 'm-m-m'?"
"I mean I'm gonna start carrying a piece and if one'er these criminal cases comes toward me out here I'm gonna hold civil-rights court right here in the street.  It's called The Ol' Wild West."

Candidate Romney Said . . .

" . . . culture makes all the differnce. . . ." Bravo for him and shame on Palestinian leaders immediatly whimpering, " . . . It's a racist statement. . . ."  Oh, really?  Now we know why Palestinians aren't using their brains to live in peace with Israel and create jobs and a higher standard of living for themselves; it has nothing to do with stagnating in a cultural rut that keeps them too busy trying to figure out how to throw rocks and shoot rockets into Israel to kill Jews whose culture promotes education, building, creating jobs, and progress.  'How dare anyone imply that Palestinian culture isn't perfect!'

Now we know why carbon-copies have been sitting in classrooms with Caucasians for decades but always remain less educated than Caucasians; don't create any jobs, don't do any building, and consider themselves to be progressing by dying their hair blonde -- and looking like clowns; being perennially less educated than Caucasians has nothing to do with stagnating in a worthless rut called black culture that keeps so-called black leaders hustling "racism."  'How dare anyone imply that our black culture ain't perfect!'

Now we know why millions of Mexicans keep fleeing Mexico to get to the United States for jobs; it has nothing to do with a culture that can't create jobs for them in Mexico; it's because of "racism" against them there.  'How dare anyone imply that our Mexican culture isn't perfect!'

Wonder if the cultures in Haiti, Jamaica, Somalia -- and the rest of Afrika and Asia -- producing tons of refugees for the United States and Europe to house, feed, clothe, and cure of diseases -- are perfect or do some of their customs in the 21st century still remind us of the Dark Ages?  With new information constantly coming to us on all subjects, politics, economics, religion, morality, immorality, etc. shouldn't all cultures be continually updated?