Straight Up!

"How does your women's club feel about him?
"We can't ignore the masses he's attracting."
"Straight up.  And your use of the word 'masses' instead of 'crowds' is interesting."
" 'Masses' connotes something firmer, stronger, relates to 'revolution'."
"Straight up.  He uses that word, too."
"Those were the days . . . it was on lips in big city USA, small town USA, Europe, Latin America, Afrika, Asia, the Middle East."
"It was thunder and lightening, victory or death throughout the world."
"When he says it I always think of a circus, a clown, tents folding . . ."

"Straight up.  And young ones love a clown."
"He gets away with it from them and leftovers from those days . . . he loves their cheering, applauding, yelling, fists pushing above their heads -- their revolutionary weapons, their cannons, bombs, bullets, dynamite . . ."
"Who in the hell laughs in a revolution?  Neither the rebels nor those repelling them."
" 'Education is gonna be free for everybody, no more poor and homeless people, all our problems are Wall Streets' fault, this is a revolution against Wall Street!' he's constantly hawking.

"Brainwashing the young romanticists.  If some one said to him:  'Put America first' and 'Make America great again,' he'd just sputter another old, dead slogan."
"Like an old balloon, doesn't have the strong air to shoot straight up in a dangerous, new atmosphere but just enough air to wobble crazily, disappearing in nonsensical debris fettered by podiums."

" . . . Totally Primitive . . . "

"Ladies and Gentlemen, as you know, our organization some years ago discovered certain primitive subjects stagnating in dark corners of our country.  And tonight, as your host, I'm proud to present to you representatives of that group.  While, physically, we aren't exactly replicas of one another, they do walk upright and we're proud of the progress we've made with the most primitive element among them, although I'll admit that it is not intellectual progress, but in their love for full locks of blond and red hair to attach to their rather short, tight  hair, we've supplied them with plaited ropes and blond and red ink to dye those false plaits --"
"Gimmi that damn microphone . . !"
"But, Miss Diddybo, you're the most eloquent person among this primitive element -- please give my microphone back . . . please . . ."

"Shut up, you ain't talking 'bout nothing -- and we ain't 'bout being showed off lak we some clowns!  We here to mess up this meaningless talking and we gon' shout this everywhere people is talking -- "
"But, Miss Diddybo, I'm shocked at your sudden obstreperous outburst  -- and give me my microphone . . . please . . ."
"I ain't giving you nothing -- and I was raised up to be a hell-raiser by my culture and um never gon' stop running my mouf 'bout nothing.  We want to be recognized as educated and stop all this 'scrimination against us and our culture --"
"But, Miss Diddybo, we have nothing against your culture -- we want to help you with it; what is your cultural language . . ?"
"We don't need no culture language, we --"
"But a common language, English, for example, unites people of many different cultures and languages -- even people as totally primitive as you're showing yourself to be --"
"My culture made me how um s'pose to be and we gon' make the world notice us --"
"But, Miss Diddybo, just tell us what you need and we'll be happy to continue helping you with more funds, jobs, educational programs --"
"Shut yo' mouf -- um doing the talking . . . !'

"See What I'm Getting At, Judge?"

" . . . and recognizing, Your Honor, that this case would surely drive any jury insane, the accused, who are also the accusers and aren't present because they're hysterical, can't stop laughing and crying, asked to be tried by you, noted for your fairness throughout the land."
"Well, this case being internationally publicized I've cut short my heart-attack recovery to hear it, so proceed."
"Your Honor, the accused have been happily married for some thirty years, but several years ago, during pillow-talk one night, they agreed that any form of sexual activity might be construed as rape and murder and from that night they've been abstaining.  But several months ago, during pillow-talk again, they decided they should share their deduction with the world because it is potentially dangerous for populations of the world . . ."
"How so?"
"Your Honor, their deduction had started with a fact so simple that they believed most humans never think of it."
"Which is?"
"A human is a spot of sperm and an egg.  And that spot of sperm and egg grow to an infant and later it sprouts into what we call a man or a woman . . ."

"So?"
"That's why we say that a man is part woman and a woman is part man -- a grown-up sperm and egg.  That's why we can give each other a little slack from time to time . . ."
"So what's the problem?"
"Well, Your Honor, in that spot of sperm and egg that combined to form us come generations of ancestors who surely brought their generations of ancestors and when we're having sex we don't know whether those generations of men and women in us like what we're doing to them or not; so, in that love-making aren't we violating each other at every stage of maturity we've come through and that we shall always carry within us, the infant --"
"Oh, holy, merciful God --"
"-- the adolescent, the teenager -- where did those stages go?  They're still in us -- see what I'm getting at, Judge"
"Please, God, no more --"
"And if there was a person in those generations in us who millions of us worship as 'holy, divine' --"
"Oh, Lord, help me, God -- oh -- my heart . . . ."

A Judge And A Shadowy Dismembering

"Your Honor,  my client pleads that though he was present at the scene and scent of the man's dismembering he had nothing to do with it; it was his shadow that tore apart the limbs of . . ."
"Counselor, the report that I have here states that your client has undergone six months of stern testing in our medical facility and found to be sane and extremely intelligent, ready to stand trial; yet you, a licensed,  respected lawyer, having the temerity of a philantropic philanderer, stand in my sanctified court of law and pander this liberal nonsense about his shadow committing this vicious crime?"
"Your Honor, I believe it to be a valid argument, considering the context of time in which I'm presenting it; today, in the 21st century, if a man can be adjudicated to be a woman and a woman to be a  man why can't a man's shadow be adjudged to be an entity total and separate unto itself?  Your Honor, haven't you ever been walking along a sidewalk and for some reason you suddenly looked down and to your left and you see the shadow of a man there and you jump, scared out of your wits, your heart pounding, then you realize, Oh, that's just my shadow .  But, Your Honor, your shadow had taken you over and caused you to react as you did, and, Your Honor, my client swears that his shadow, whom he often disputes with, got into his head and hands and arms and used him to commit that bloody crime . . ."

"I admit, Counselor, that I believe we all at one time or another have been frightened by our shadow, but that doesn't prove that a shadow is --"
"Your Honor, getting back to my first analogy, even though that person who was a he or a she who was changed by being cut and gutted, that 'he' is gonna overshadow that new 'she' of him forever, as any new 'he' is gonna be overshadowed by his old she.  And that former him and her will forever overshadow the new 'she' and 'he' entering all places where a natural he and she have privacy --"
"Enough!  Basta!  Assez!   This shadow-business overshadows not only your client's case but it is so precedential in its nature that not only is our entire legal system threatened by this liberal interpretation of a law that reverberates with nature's reverence but the very foundation of our society will be destroyed by this outrage of liberal muscling, and neither I nor my shadow will be a part of that -- I quit, resign, turn this case over to another court and pray that we will get back to electing a President who will adhere to our Constitution and will name a man or woman who puts 'America First' to that vacant seat on our Supreme Court!"

Call The Police

"If you were a policeman would you go into one of those communities?"
"Sure.  But I'd pull my gun out the moment I entered one, to let them know that I don't play."
"Those communities are filled with people who'll attack you even when you have a gun on them."
"That's why, though I'm not a policeman, I wouldn't go into one without a gun."
"You have a permit to carry a gun?"
"Why you ask me that?  That little detail doesn't matter to one of those ignorant fools with a gun."
"I think they hope we'll shoot them in the leg or hand so they can sue us for millions, but I asked you that because I've got to go on this domestic violence call and I want you to accompany me . . ."
"Where is it?"

"What difference does it make?  You're one of  those volunteers to accompany an officer on a call aren't you?"
"Is it a black community?"
"It is."
"People from those communities are marching in the streets chanting 'Kill the police,' their children are throwing rocks  and bottles and pointing toy guns at them, even trying to wrestle an officer's gun from him -- providing all those people with anti-white, anti-American feelings an avenue to unmask their feelings, cutting off their nose to spite their face --"
"That's why you'd be the perfect witness --"
"But they're not only against the police they're killing each other, so they'll shoot me first . . ."
"They couldn't call you a racist . . ."
"They wouldn't have to.  That's the job of their so-called leaders and agitators . . . always eager to praise and encourage them in their right to disturb the peace . . . besides, I  identify with black people and not with these ignorant n-word fools."

Running Games

The middle-aged man and lanky teenager sat on a park bench a couple of blocks from a high school.  "You mean we'll all be able to go to college for free . . . who's gonna pay for it?"
"If he's elected by you young people his government will make the rich pay for it.  They've got all of our money and just sitting on it."
"I wanna go to college, but I don't believe that some people who don't even know me are gonna pay for me to go," the teenager said, and thought, This dude must be half crazy.
"All you have to do is work with other kids who're campaigning for him in all the colleges and neighborhoods throughout the country.  This can't fail," he said, thinking, They're pampered and brainwashed to try any slick game for something free.
"What if I can't find a job, where am I gonna get money for housing, food, and clothing?  I can't be just sitting in college and don't have no social life.  Where will I get bucks for my good time?"

"His educational program will be funded by the government to take care of all that.  Listen, the government's got plenty of money, that's why people run games on it.  For example, like clockwork your people riot and loot and demand millions of dollars and new programs to rebuild neighborhoods that hoodlums have destroyed in the rioting."
"That game's been going on for a hundred years."
"You young people don't have the experience of working and travel and have no knowledge to recognize the games that are run on your people by your own leaders."
"If we had some truly educated and sincere leaders they'd have created a productive culture unique to our people, as other people have, rather than keep us stagnating in a so-called culture centered around nothing but constantly changing our hair styles.  Now they got people hustling us by selling us ropes to attach to our hair and calling it black culture.  But as far as somebody talking about making rich people and the government provide free college for everybody, that sounds like somebody running a game on dummies to me."

Big Guy

Not that something similar, but not the real thing, hadn't been done before.  Every size of dirt that called itself a country, territory, state, county, city, town, or village had experienced a hint of it, and everybody knew how to do it.  According to them.  They saw it happening and not only talked about it in the streets, on their jobs, in their homes; they wrote of it in newspapers, magazines, books, and talked it on radio and TV shows.  Yet, it was a mystery and not a mystery because everybody knew all the answers.  "It's so easy," they were constantly proclaiming.  So why hadn't one of them done it?

The policemen and secret agents would find their work around it so much easier if they'd only talk to one of these know-it-all.  Day and night, people -- even children -- were clamoring about it.  And they were not just common, humdrum people; they were big-time, honest, and crooked politicians and business people; even gamblers were taking bets that he could or couldn't pull it off; children were betting each other with their pennies.  It was his style that captivated them.

They had given him that proverbial "Snow Ball In Hell" chance when they first heard about him, but he had a natural flair for doing the unexpected, taking unbelievable, sure to fail moves, and making them work.  One minute he was saying "this" and the next he had moved to "that".  He was here, then there, and they were talking about  him all over the world, believing he could accomplish anything, and make it look easy.  In fact, he told them:  "You've got to be unpredictable.  You can't let your enemy know every move you're gonna make."
That's when they began calling him "Big Guy.!"

Degrading The White House?

Mention the name "White House" and positive thoughts come to most of us.  They come headed by a magnificent white mansion housing the most powerful office in our country -- if not the world -- and they include the names of men who sat in that office.  We think of the wars that our brave soldiers fought in during the tenure of some men in that office who's strength and skill saved our country from enemy boots marching through the streets of our cities.

Recently, there was an event at the White House that many Americans called a celebration, others called a comedy, many called a disaster, still others didn't know what to call it.  Stop for a moment and think of the centuries of blood that the foundation of this White House rests  upon.  Now think of these slimy good-for-nothings who spit on the American flag, stomp on it, and burn it while, before and after, beg for more welfare.  And bleeding-heart ignoramuses defend them and their actions.

The low or high point of this event at the White House, depending on whether one's degree of sanity is positive-high or negative-low, seemed to have been a speaker brought in to entertain those fortunate enough to acquire an invitation to this lavish event.  Dignified men and women representing the rich and powerful in politics, business, entertainment, education, science, the military, journalism, and other noteworthy fields of endeavor sat eating and drinking, straining to find humor in the entertainer's attempt at comedy.  Suddenly, the entertainer looked at the man who sits in the office at the White House, the President of the United States, and said, ". .  . my nigga . . . ."